So obviously, it's been since April that I've written a blog post. And my posts prior to the most recent were... sporadic at best. Practically non-existant at worst.
And I've recently found myself thinking
"Gosh, Brinksy... You REALLY should blog more."
Follow by the thought "About what though? And WHY?"
Sign #1 that I'm a horrible blogger? I had my first "blogiversary" and failed to realize it, let alone mention it.
When I first started, I was full of grand ambitions, starting a runstreak and talking about all the fun events I had run and would run in the future. Sharing my experiences with everyone and meeting new people.
And I loved it. Every day, I would use my lunch break to faithfully update "my readers" about my progress. How many miles. How fast. What the terrain was like. How running made me feel.
If I ran a race, I gleefully posted re-caps, wanting to be honest about the good, the bad, and everything in between. I was gonna be the honest reviewer! Readers could trust me!
I joined groups of other women and men, dedicated to sharing their passion for blogging about running. We discussed styles, and etiquette, and ways to improve your readership, and strategy!
And it started to sink in that perhaps, what I had to contribute was not enough.
Why would anyone want to read my blog? Was it simply a vanity project?
An online journal for people to tell me how pretty and fast and smart I was?
WHAT DID I HAVE TO CONTRIBUTE TO THE
VAST WORLD THAT IS INTERNET BLOGGERS?
I wasn't particularly good at running. Middle of the pack, consistently. I had no training tips, no insider information on how to be the very best runner you could be.
Was I a mom, struggling to find a way to make time for running while juggling twins in a stroller, a full-time job, and a needy, yet supportive husband?
No. I have only the full-time job and an overly affectionate dog-child. I barely make time for running somedays with those. I certainly was no help for someone looking to find encouragement while trying to be a mommy-runner.
Had I miraculously used running to drop untold pounds of weight and change my life?
No. I've never weighed much more than I do now. Maintaining my weight hasn't been an issue. I don't say this to be boastful, but almost out of shame, as if good genes have robbed me of the opportunity to be succesfful at blogging. Damn my genetics for preventing my from having a gimmick for becoming a popular blogger!
Dieting. That lifetime of maintaining a healthy weight is surely the result of an attention to the types of food I consume. I must be vegan, or vegetarian, or at least strictly low-carb.
No. Sadly, my idea of a healthy diet is managing to not eat frozen pizza for breakfast, and even there, I regularly fail. I don't often think anout the food I put in my body, other than the fact that if something sounds good, I will most likely eat it. No one should ever turn to me for advice on how to improve their eating habits. Perhaps there is a subset of the blogging world that is looking for someone to show them how to eat like crap? I will be their guide!
Even my online persona, RunBrinksyRun, which, at the time of creation had seemed like a stroke of genius (And not at all a reference to Forrest Gump), became a cause of shame as I saw other names similar to it pop up across the web...
But here's the thing...
"Well, if I can't be the best, why even bother."
But the bother is because I enjoyed doing it. And right now, as I'm struggling with my running, I need to return to the things that I enjoyed doing. And I used to enjoy blogging. And hopefully, I still do... But there's only one way to find out...
So brace yourselves, y'all...
CAUSE I'M BACK!
#runlove, y'all. Let's get it back.